after Kevin's chiropractor we stopped by moms. her porch is in progress.

got my call from the specialist I was referred to. being overweight makes acid reflux worse. that's why it keeps getting worse. I've lived with it for years. YEARS. minimum 45 lb. weight loss before surgery. they have a medical weight loss program I qualify for. recommend gastric by-pass. if anything is wrong with my gall bladder, it'll go. (if i would gain back weight, the hernia repair could fail.) I have the weekend to weigh my options. I am leaning heavily towards just keep on keepin' on. I'll give up sweet tea and pepsi, but life will be less enjoyable. gastric by-pass scares me. greatly. so back to the hoop. walking. watching what I eat. I won't be having surgery this year most likely, so will have to pay my $3000 AGAIN next year. this is why I hate going to the dr. it can never be something easy. I know I am fat. I know I am getting fatter. I know I'll feel better. sigh. how did that girl in high school who lived on PVM and Ayds diet candy and Diet Tab and Dexatrim and baked potato diets get to this point? how did I become this weeks episode on My 600 Lb. Life? unfat people do not understand fat people. I was a fat people BEFORE I was a fat people. I know that fat girl will always be in my head. maybe that's where she belongs. I hate change. I suck at it.